It's June!!! It's another holiday season. Like every year, we ask: what holiday? This june is even more special because it is even less of a holiday. Our exams actually begin right after this break.
I thought it was a nice placement, because after all, you are given one month at your disposal to study for your subjects. If I can make do with a few days or even one night for all my previous tests surely I can do it with an average of one week per subject.
What can go wrong??
Since it's June, it calls for some closure on the first half of 2015. It a pretty wild year so far, I guess. I've accomplished so much more in shchoir (SYF and concert) and ISAC. Thought studies would be tough but have yet to fail anything (OK except for that 5/21 atmo paper. Hahahaha h8 u physical-technical-geog) which is pleasantly surprising. Went for a geog competition (which was on urban geog!) with the best team ever and winning something was the cherry on top :) Crazy planning for DHAP finally ended after 3 days which effectively consumed all of my first week of holidays. Spent the weekend preparing for MES which was good but to be honest, I wouldn't go if I had a choice. Lost another 3 days in week 2 and really only began studying for JCTs last Thursday.
Just wanna spend more time to talk about choir: I still remember that fateful Monday practice when Ms Tham and the teachers sat us down for the whole 3 hours to talk about whether or not we want to pull out of SYF. We were already short on time (Ideally, 3 songs should be completed by Jan but it was late Jan and we were not even near done with Impressions), Ms Tham practices are once a week, and she just spent the whole practice doing zero singing - put two and two together, you realise that the this is pretty much a very, very grave matter. But it was also the most raw practice I've ever been to, because each one of us had to say if we wanted to go, which led to really heart-warming, passionate speeches and tears. More tears than expected. So many different perspectives - how this SYF is a last time to share the stage with lifelong friends, "MCTs are not even graded anyway", I don't want to live a life with regrets, I'm new but I really want to try, you all are the best thing that has ever happened to me and even if it's a difficult fight I want us to go and fight - I want to fight. It was an emotional practice. Afterward, my whatsapp ringed all night with this same group of people reinforcing what was discussed, and now with solid plans on how we need to toughen up ourselves physically, musically, mentally.
It was easy to get inspired but the months that followed were an uphill climb. Our seniors were crazy smart, and half of them were knocked down to go for friday H3 lessons (this doesn't even include those who took the school-based H3s - they are insane), so a quarter of the choir was gone. In fact, we probably didnt get through all three songs without breaking down until late February - which leaves us with 2 weeks to get to a suitable standard so our paid test rehearsal won't go to waste. There was a lot of chionging - the moment year 6s ended their CT, we jumped into a bus for NJC to exchange our pieces (needless to say it left us completely demoralized as we did not do well). Somewhere along the way, all the after-practice reflections, PTs, getting scolded for being late for Saturday pracs, tears, more tears, muscle aches, tideous cramming of Impressions (100++ bars of rhythm and melody with zero pattern oh my god), lou-hei, after-prac dinners, a lot of familiar laughter, very stupid whatsapp conversations, even stupider photos, we made it for school for PT at 6.30am on that Thursday, we sang and danced to siepe (but alas it was sharp) at the track with sun rising in the horizon, showered and ate breakfast in the canteen and tricking the whole school into thinking we slept over, had flag-raising in the Choir room. Standing backstage and doing pre-concert rituals. Somehow Ms Tham's smile reassures. Suddenly it did not matter that we, a choir who dangerously met the number requirement for SYF, were sandwiched between two powerhouse choirs. It did not matter that there was a chance our efforts may not be met with a Distinction (this is exactly the point during aforementioned Monday). It did not matter because I had the best performance ever in my 5 years of Choir and I actually legit felt VERY happy for the first time as I stepped down. It did not matter when we found out by noon the next day we did get the D and Mrs Lee and Hilda and I ran towards each other in the canteen and screamed while in embrace. Truly, no regrets.
It was also half a year of emotional extremes I guess? As highlighted by previous post. To those who really came and talk to me: It really wasn't aimed at any one of you. I meant it in a really general sense. If it's anyone's problem it should be mine. You are all very precious to me and you get me going :-) I am managing better. Slowly but surely.
Don't know whether to laugh and cry at my state of revision.
